Lessons from Iceland: How Letting Go Leads to a Fuller Life

Disclaimer: As I write this, I recognize how difficult it can be to change behaviors, especially when it involves time and your mindset. By absolutely no means am I an expert–just a girl trying to work through the things and ideas I find myself attached to.

This piece is dedicated to anyone who relates to that struggle or to those who are just trying to unpack what "attachment" means in their lives and how to free themselves from it, bit by bit.

Certified Coach, Brittany leads early morning yoga

Whether it's releasing a relationship, a job, lost luggage, the outcome of a situation, or parting ways with an old version of ourselves, letting go isn't easy. With it comes the weight of comfort, security, or expectations you once had or still cling to–and that disconnection, at times, may even leave a void. As someone who struggles with anxiety and the unsettling uncertainty of the unknown, at times, this propels my brain into autopilot, planning or creating potential scenarios of how I think things should unfold. Though at times, it's helpful, it sometimes leads to an exhausting cycle, leaving me in a puddle of disappointment. 

While there's a pang of defeat or melancholy in the thought of letting something or someone go, there's also beauty in recognizing that this experience is universal. With the release of that thing we've been attached to comes the freedom to live presently, appreciate what matters most, and perhaps, an opportunity to welcome something new. 

I've heard Frozen's "Let It Go" more times than I can count thanks to my niece, but it wasn't until a recent trip to Iceland with SurfYogaBeer that the concept of "non-attachment," not attaching myself to an expectation or outcome, struck a chord.

What is non-attachment?

Have you ever been so laser-focused on an outcome that you felt deflated or questioned your capability when things didn't go as planned? (🙋🏼‍♀️Slowly raises a hand to the sky.) This experience taps into the core of non-attachment, a concept that encourages us to engage with life without fixating on specific results or outcomes. For some, attachment might look like over-fixating on the future or setting rigid personal goals, while for others, it might look like holding onto physical items or defining ourselves by our jobs or relationships.

While easier said than done, practicing non-attachment invites us to remain present and open to new possibilities by letting go of rigid expectations. Though we're often bombarded with messages about what we "should" have or achieve, what if we tried to loosen the grip and approached these pressures and desires with a more flexible mindset instead of clinging tightly to how we think things should be? When we learn to release, we're not losing. We're gaining peace, clarity, and a renewed sense of self. If Elsa could let it go, perhaps we can learn to let go of our attachments, too.

Post-hike - Þríhyrningur, Iceland

Lessons From Iceland

Life is constantly in flux

Our 41-person Iceland group quickly developed a theme around non-attachment when, after weeks of our WhatsApp chat filled with questions about the weather, what to pack, and concerns about being cold came to a screeching halt on day one. Iceland stepped in, ready to teach a masterclass on perfectly illustrating the concept of non-attachment, when she threw windy, sideways rain at us, testing our adaptability and water-resistant gear. From that first day, gone were any expectations of dry socks, as this group put aside the preconceived thoughts of "Iceland in the summer" and ran a 5K against some brutal winds and jumped through muddy puddles to get epic waterfall photos.

From being bundled in a down jacket one moment to ripping off layers the next, Iceland reminded us that life is unpredictable. Embracing its variability allowed us to appreciate each moment for what it is, rather than getting caught up in how we think it should be. 

Embracing the rain @ Seljalandsfoss

There's beauty in transience

Just as Iceland's volcanic lava eventually cools into solid rock, we can find beauty in how fleeting experiences contribute to the richness of our lives. Maybe that relationship you let go of led you to travel the world. Perhaps that job you didn't get led you down a new creative path, or by cutting yourself some slack from worrying about that future thing you don't have, you open yourself up more to experiences happening right before you. 

Embrace what's in front of you

Just like the ever-changing weather in Iceland, where you can experience all four seasons in a single day, we're taught that things, moments, and experiences are temporary. I think back to that first day, drenched and battling the rain and winds at Seljalandsfoss waterfall, and feel grateful to myself that instead of complaining about crappy weather and running for shelter on our bus, I embraced the moment, soggy clothes and all. At that moment, the quote, "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning to dance in the rain," had never felt less corny and more accurate. And dance in the rain (or cold-plunge into icy-cold oceans), we did.

A quick plunge into Icelandic waters

Practicing Non-Attachment IRL

Certified Life Coach and yoga instructor Brittany Polanco reminds us that "practicing non-attachment means moving away from perfectionism since there is no such thing, supported by self-compassion and showing ourselves the same grace and kindness we would to others." Here, Brittany shares three practical ways to practice non-attachment in real life. 

Tune into the present moment

• Ground yourself by tuning in to all five senses. Ask yourself, "What am I currently feeling, seeing, smelling, hearing, and tasting?
• Once you're grounded, try to build awareness of what stories you're telling yourself. Is this helpful? Is it true? Is there someone else's perspective I can try to consider? It can help to write this down in a journal. Awareness is a critical first step in identifying the areas where attachment is present for you.

Become aware of inflexible language

• When we use the phrases "I am/am not" or "I can/can't," it can be difficult to hold beliefs that contradict such strong language.  
• Try introducing more flexibility by adding the words "sometimes" or "yet." For example, "I can't run a mile without walking, yet," or "I am distracted, sometimes." By challenging the permanence of your stories, you invite the opportunity to grow, learn, and improve as you put in the time and effort.

Focus on the process, not the outcome

• There is no getting around that time and effort are required to make any change. It took time to establish the attachments you have, and it will take time to unravel those that don't serve you.
• The more we can focus on consistent, deliberate practice (i.e., setting aside time to build awareness), the more we will alleviate the stress and suffering that can accompany attachment. 

However we go about loosening our grip on our attachments, it's important to remember that it's a process, not a one-time event, and each small step taken towards letting go of that thing or that outcome holding us down should be celebrated. If you're at a crossroads, wondering whether to hold on to something or let it go, consider booking a trip to Iceland and letting Mother Nature teach you how to embrace dancing in the _____ (insert any weather type here).

Post-hike hotsprings @ Landmannalaugar

SurfYogaBeer is an active and social travel company focused on global, local, and private adventures, offering group trips for people of all ages and fitness levels. We're all looking for adventure. Travel with us–change your life.